Mini-masterclass with Helen Storckmeijer, cultural transformation and change management specialist.
Your brain treats feedback like a tiger in a dark alley. Same alarm system, same fight-or-flight response. Which explains a lot about why we avoid these conversations, and why they can go sideways when we do finally have them.
Helen Storckmeijer has spent over 20 years in organisational development, coaching and HR, and now works as a fractional People & Culture leader from Brisbane. She calls them courageous conversations rather than difficult ones, and walks through how to have them without the dread.
💡 Most feedback conversations fail early. When delivery feels like judgement, the brain hits the alarm and the other person stops taking anything in. Unsolicited advice, mixed messages, and critiquing personality instead of behaviour all send people into the red zone. Your job is to keep them in the green, where they can actually hear you.
💡 Ask before you assume. Helen shared a story from her JP Morgan days: a team leader wanted to performance-manage someone for chronic lateness. Instead, they asked a question that changed their entire perspective. Before you draw conclusions, try ‘can you walk me through what happened?’
💡 Structure it with SBI: Situation, Behaviour, Impact. Practice structuring feedback to be clear, calm and kind.
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"I really enjoyed this - I particularly like the comment around “my job is to become an expert at their perspective” and focussing on being relentlessly curious! I think it is quite helpful at removing some of the emotions!"
